The title of this group is Single Mothers Making a Difference. Well, how can we make a difference? There are so many ways that we can make a difference, but today I want to focus on our children.
I raised my children to be giving and kind, among many other things. Our society today is so involved in self.... self worth, thinking highly of yourself, etc. Many children, and parents alike are too self absorbed. I did not want my children growing up thinking only of themselves. I learned early on that the best way to teach your children is by example. So, when we found out of someone in our church that was in the hospital, the kids would make a card for them, we would buy a small vase of flowers and then go visit. At Christmas time, we would bake or make items to give to people at church. If we went to McDonald's to get something to eat and there was someone sitting on the sidewalk that looked like they were homeless or hungry, I would order them a bigger meal than what we had and let the kids give it to them. One time I was pumping gas and a man walked up to me and said that he did not have any gas and could I give him some money for gas. Well, I did not have much money to put gas in my own car, but told him to pull up to the pump when I was finished and I gave him half of what I was going to put in my car.
Why did I do all these things? Because I wanted my children to see that taking care and being kind to others was more important than taking care of ourselves. And each time I did something like that, I always made it a learning lesson. I explained why I did what I did and told them that it was very important to let God use us to be a blessing to someone else. I even found that at times when I was discouraged or depressed, doing these things made my day brighter.
Thanksgiving is a good time to teach your children to be giving. We have so much to be thankful for and we ought to teach our children to be thankful for what they have and to help the less fortunate.
Let's determine to take time to teach our children to think of others first. And as they get older, pray that God helps them to continue thinking of others instead of self.
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Parenting takes commitment
A reporter for the U.S. News and World Report from 1994 once wrote on our culture's view of parenting:
"Americans are so shaped and stamped by their legacy of individualism that the concepts of community virtue and moral obligation have been discredited. In our popular culture, adulthood is too often defined as doing what you want to do, not what you are supposed to do. Making a baby is a sign of status, while caring for one is not. Right and wrong are old-fashioned, politically incorrect concepts. And sin? Forget it...Half of all Americans who marry and have children eventually divorce. For many, marriage is more like a hobby than a commitment, a phase instead of a trust. We are becoming a country of deadbeat dads who don't pay their bills and dead-tired moms who work two jobs to pick up the slack. Even many parents who pay for their children don't pay attention to their children. In so doing, they miss out on some of life's greatest joys: hearing a small giggle or holding a small hand. Probably the best thing that society can do for its toddlers is to make 'parent' an honorable title again. No job is more important, yet no job is more often taken for granted. We teach work skills but not life skills, how to change a carburetor but not a diaper, how to treat a customer but not a kid. Becoming a parent should be...a sign of a lasting relationship, not just a passing infatuation; a source of pride, and not remorse. Only then will our children be safe."
Although the article wasn't written from a Christ-centered viewpoint, it points out many flaws in our views of parenting. In order to raise Godly children, we must first be committed.
We have to be commitment to parenting. When we become a parent, we realize the extra work required to train a child. Our responsibility moves past changing diapers and providing food, but also includes teaching our children Godly principles and values, correcting them when they disobey and helping them see God's plan for their lives.
As single parents, we ought to thank God that He has blessed us with our children. We should never take for granted the lives he has allowed us to shape. Our responsibility as single parents is more difficult than others, but with God's help we can be just as successful as any parent at seeing our children grow to love God and serve Him.
Are you committed to raising godly children? Being committed to raising Godly children takes work, but God trusted us when He gave us our children and it is foolish of us to take that trust lightly.
Let's determine that no matter what we've done in the past, we are going to be committed to raising our children the way that God wants and expects us to raise our children. We only get one chance!
"Americans are so shaped and stamped by their legacy of individualism that the concepts of community virtue and moral obligation have been discredited. In our popular culture, adulthood is too often defined as doing what you want to do, not what you are supposed to do. Making a baby is a sign of status, while caring for one is not. Right and wrong are old-fashioned, politically incorrect concepts. And sin? Forget it...Half of all Americans who marry and have children eventually divorce. For many, marriage is more like a hobby than a commitment, a phase instead of a trust. We are becoming a country of deadbeat dads who don't pay their bills and dead-tired moms who work two jobs to pick up the slack. Even many parents who pay for their children don't pay attention to their children. In so doing, they miss out on some of life's greatest joys: hearing a small giggle or holding a small hand. Probably the best thing that society can do for its toddlers is to make 'parent' an honorable title again. No job is more important, yet no job is more often taken for granted. We teach work skills but not life skills, how to change a carburetor but not a diaper, how to treat a customer but not a kid. Becoming a parent should be...a sign of a lasting relationship, not just a passing infatuation; a source of pride, and not remorse. Only then will our children be safe."
Although the article wasn't written from a Christ-centered viewpoint, it points out many flaws in our views of parenting. In order to raise Godly children, we must first be committed.
We have to be commitment to parenting. When we become a parent, we realize the extra work required to train a child. Our responsibility moves past changing diapers and providing food, but also includes teaching our children Godly principles and values, correcting them when they disobey and helping them see God's plan for their lives.
As single parents, we ought to thank God that He has blessed us with our children. We should never take for granted the lives he has allowed us to shape. Our responsibility as single parents is more difficult than others, but with God's help we can be just as successful as any parent at seeing our children grow to love God and serve Him.
Are you committed to raising godly children? Being committed to raising Godly children takes work, but God trusted us when He gave us our children and it is foolish of us to take that trust lightly.
Let's determine that no matter what we've done in the past, we are going to be committed to raising our children the way that God wants and expects us to raise our children. We only get one chance!
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Why worry?
Worry is the act of distrusting God and trusting self.
How much time a day do you spend worrying? Have you ever stopped to think about how much you worry? Consider these statistics from a recent study on the focus of people's worries:
40% - things that will never happen
30% - things about the past that can't be changed
12% - things about criticism by others, mostly untrue
10% - about health, which gets worse with stress
8% - about real problems that will be faced
Most of the time spent worrying is spent on things that will never happen. Have you ever worried about a potential problem at work, a possible catastrophic event, or a supposed circumstance only to have it not come true?
Single parents unfortunately worry a lot because a lot of times we feel like we are in it by ourselves but that is the furthest thing from the truth. Everything that we go through, God is right there with us and He longs to take our burdens, if we will only given them to Him. "Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you." Our job isn't to worry about what will happen to us, but to trust that God has everything under control.
God loves us and doesn't want anything to harm us, yet many of us believe we need to look out for ourselves. As is the mindset in our world, looking out for yourself and preparing for the worst is the only way to assure you're taken care of. Yet God teaches that because He knows the future, we should trust Him to care for us.
Let's determine to turn over our worries and cares to God and let Him provide and take care of us.
How much time a day do you spend worrying? Have you ever stopped to think about how much you worry? Consider these statistics from a recent study on the focus of people's worries:
40% - things that will never happen
30% - things about the past that can't be changed
12% - things about criticism by others, mostly untrue
10% - about health, which gets worse with stress
8% - about real problems that will be faced
Most of the time spent worrying is spent on things that will never happen. Have you ever worried about a potential problem at work, a possible catastrophic event, or a supposed circumstance only to have it not come true?
Single parents unfortunately worry a lot because a lot of times we feel like we are in it by ourselves but that is the furthest thing from the truth. Everything that we go through, God is right there with us and He longs to take our burdens, if we will only given them to Him. "Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you." Our job isn't to worry about what will happen to us, but to trust that God has everything under control.
God loves us and doesn't want anything to harm us, yet many of us believe we need to look out for ourselves. As is the mindset in our world, looking out for yourself and preparing for the worst is the only way to assure you're taken care of. Yet God teaches that because He knows the future, we should trust Him to care for us.
Let's determine to turn over our worries and cares to God and let Him provide and take care of us.
Friday, October 21, 2011
Even in our weakness, God's power is strong!
A missionary was once guest lecturing in a college classroom of future church planters. Among other topics, he was to speak on the subject of God's power. To illustrate this truth, he told a story from when he first arrived on the mission field. A missionary with little money but great zeal, he realized his need for transportation around the country. After a few weeks, a new convert of his learned of his predicament and offered to give him an old car. The only problem with the car was that it wouldn't start without some manual help. Not deterred, the missionary figured out a plan to get his car going. He would ask strangers on the street outside his home for help pushing his car every morning, then he'd either park on a hill or leave the engine running as he visited homes. His plan worked well, and the car was of great use to him over the next two years.
Suffering from sickness, the missionary was forced to return home for some time, but before he left, he met with the missionary who was to take his place. He explained to him the workings of his ministry, then showed him the car and proudly described the routine used to get the car going. As the older missionary explained his "plan," the younger one looked under the hood of the car at the engine. After a few minutes the younger missionary said, "It looks like the only problem with this car is a loose cable." After connecting some wires, the car started automatically. The older missionary stood in astonishment. He had been needlessly struggling with the car for two years when the power was there all along. All he had to do was connect the cables!
I've learned this lesson many times before, and am currently learning it again. Last week I fell on our concrete back porch and severely pulled the muscles in the back of my leg and suffered from severe muscle spasms for many days, also had a hard time sitting and standing. The day after I feel, I went to work only to find out a few hours later that I was laid off. All that went through my mind was how was I going to pay all my bills? How was I going to provide, buy food, pay the electric bill? How was I going to pay for my health insurance that I HAD to keep because if I lost it I would never be covered for my back injury again? All these things went through my mind as the tears rolled down my face. For days I felt like a failure. I felt as if everyone had a job except me. When I went to the grocery store I felt as if everyone had plenty of money to pay for their food except me. I know I was having a pity party, but in all my years I had NEVER lost a job or been laid off. I was and am in a position I have never been in before, a position in which I must rely completely upon God and God alone. I still don't know what I am going to do, it's been a week and still no job, but I keep reminding myself every day that God is in control, He knows what is best and He has the best job for me. Sure, I still find myself wanting to creep back into my self pity stage because I am human, but I just remind myself that God loves me and He is watching over me. Try as I may, this is a problem that I cannot solve myself.
Sometimes we can become like the older missionary. When faced with a problem, we seek our own solution and struggle needlessly. However, God wants us to realize that even when we can't solve a problem, He can.
No matter what struggle we have in our lives today, let's determine to trust God and let Him provide.
Suffering from sickness, the missionary was forced to return home for some time, but before he left, he met with the missionary who was to take his place. He explained to him the workings of his ministry, then showed him the car and proudly described the routine used to get the car going. As the older missionary explained his "plan," the younger one looked under the hood of the car at the engine. After a few minutes the younger missionary said, "It looks like the only problem with this car is a loose cable." After connecting some wires, the car started automatically. The older missionary stood in astonishment. He had been needlessly struggling with the car for two years when the power was there all along. All he had to do was connect the cables!
I've learned this lesson many times before, and am currently learning it again. Last week I fell on our concrete back porch and severely pulled the muscles in the back of my leg and suffered from severe muscle spasms for many days, also had a hard time sitting and standing. The day after I feel, I went to work only to find out a few hours later that I was laid off. All that went through my mind was how was I going to pay all my bills? How was I going to provide, buy food, pay the electric bill? How was I going to pay for my health insurance that I HAD to keep because if I lost it I would never be covered for my back injury again? All these things went through my mind as the tears rolled down my face. For days I felt like a failure. I felt as if everyone had a job except me. When I went to the grocery store I felt as if everyone had plenty of money to pay for their food except me. I know I was having a pity party, but in all my years I had NEVER lost a job or been laid off. I was and am in a position I have never been in before, a position in which I must rely completely upon God and God alone. I still don't know what I am going to do, it's been a week and still no job, but I keep reminding myself every day that God is in control, He knows what is best and He has the best job for me. Sure, I still find myself wanting to creep back into my self pity stage because I am human, but I just remind myself that God loves me and He is watching over me. Try as I may, this is a problem that I cannot solve myself.
Sometimes we can become like the older missionary. When faced with a problem, we seek our own solution and struggle needlessly. However, God wants us to realize that even when we can't solve a problem, He can.
No matter what struggle we have in our lives today, let's determine to trust God and let Him provide.
Monday, September 26, 2011
Pressures of Life
The story of a parakeet named Chippie reminds me of the pressures and unexpected circumstances we can face in life. Chippie never saw it coming. One second he was peacefully perched in his cage. The next he was sucked in, washed up, and blown over. The problem began when Chippie's owner decided to clean Chippie's cage with her vacuum cleaner. It was when she turned to answer the phone that Chippie accidentally got sucked in.
The owner gasped, put down the phone, turned off the vacuum, and opened the bag. There was Chippie-still alive, but stunned. She grabbed him and raced to the bathroom to wash him off. Then, realizing that Chippie was soaked and shivering, she reached for the hair dryer and blasted the pet with hot air. Poor Chippie never knew what hit him.
A few days after the trauma, a reporter contacted Chippie's owner to see how the bird was recovering. "Well," she replied, "Chippie doesn't sing much anymore-he just sits and stares."
Sometimes we may face days like that. We may start off the day singing on our perches, but wind up stunned and staring into space. It may be a stalled car, a sick child, or problems at work. Sometimes what we think is a calm day can turn into a day filled with unexpected heartache.
We all have those days and as a single parent it can seem very overwhelming because the weight of the world seems to be all on our shoulders. Many times we get out of bed singing but only a short time later we want to just want to go back to bed and skip the day. Or perhaps it's a day when we just do not have the strength or want to get out of bed at all.
God knows what we are feeling and what we are going through and He cares. When things go wrong in our lives, He is right there with us and longs to help us through situations if we just turn to Him and ask Him for help. God doesn't promise to help us out of the problem, He promises to help us through the problem if we only ask.
Are you going through a trial today? Are the pressures in your life mounting? First Peter 5:7 says, "Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you." Christ cares for you and wants to help you. Let's determine to take time today to cast your cares upon the Lord. He knows what you are going through, and He wants to help you today.
The owner gasped, put down the phone, turned off the vacuum, and opened the bag. There was Chippie-still alive, but stunned. She grabbed him and raced to the bathroom to wash him off. Then, realizing that Chippie was soaked and shivering, she reached for the hair dryer and blasted the pet with hot air. Poor Chippie never knew what hit him.
A few days after the trauma, a reporter contacted Chippie's owner to see how the bird was recovering. "Well," she replied, "Chippie doesn't sing much anymore-he just sits and stares."
Sometimes we may face days like that. We may start off the day singing on our perches, but wind up stunned and staring into space. It may be a stalled car, a sick child, or problems at work. Sometimes what we think is a calm day can turn into a day filled with unexpected heartache.
We all have those days and as a single parent it can seem very overwhelming because the weight of the world seems to be all on our shoulders. Many times we get out of bed singing but only a short time later we want to just want to go back to bed and skip the day. Or perhaps it's a day when we just do not have the strength or want to get out of bed at all.
God knows what we are feeling and what we are going through and He cares. When things go wrong in our lives, He is right there with us and longs to help us through situations if we just turn to Him and ask Him for help. God doesn't promise to help us out of the problem, He promises to help us through the problem if we only ask.
Are you going through a trial today? Are the pressures in your life mounting? First Peter 5:7 says, "Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you." Christ cares for you and wants to help you. Let's determine to take time today to cast your cares upon the Lord. He knows what you are going through, and He wants to help you today.
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
What do you do when a hurricane hits your life?
What I will be sharing with you the next few blogs is very personal, but I feel that it can be of help because I know I am not the only one that has gone through things like this and I want to be an encouragement.
I get very nervous when hurricane season comes because of the two hurricane that we had one right after another just a few years ago. I do NOT like hurricane season. But just recently, I found my life in hurricane season and it felt like a category 5. My daughter and son sat me down one night and started telling me of things that had happened to them when they were smaller, things that I had no idea about. They relayed to me that my father had done terrible, wicked things to them when they were younger. At first it seemed as if I were in a dream, but it wasn't a dream, it was true. As everything unfolded and time went on, my father was arrested and put in jail. Shortly after being put in jail, he passed away. At that time, I lost not only my father, but also my whole family because my mother, brother, his family, my aunt and uncles all stopped talking to me.
I felt as if I was standing outside during a hurricane and all the force of the wind and rain was blowing against me. I felt as if I just wanted to surrender and let the wind and rain take me anywhere but here. My heart broke because of what my children had endured when they were younger and were still enduring, and because I had lost the rest of my family. I've endured heart-ache before, but I had my family to help me through it and show support. This time I had no one to turn to, no one but God and He was enough! God knew my heart, He knew exactly what I was feeling. Many times when I prayed I did not even say anything, I could not, my heart was breaking too much. But I did not have to say anything, God knew exactly how I felt and what I needed.
I also had to remember that my children were watching me. I wanted to set the right example for them as to how they should respond when bad things happen to them, as it did. I wanted them to learn to turn to God and rely on His strength and comfort. I spent much time in prayer for them and encouraged them to spend much time in prayer talking to God.
Have you been through something similar in your life? Have you given up or have you turned it over to God knowing that He works everything to good? We must remember that our children learn how to respond to the problems of life by how we respond. Let's determine to set the right example for our children and when the hurricanes of life come our way, let's show our children that God is our refuge and strength in the time of trouble. Let's show them that God is our fortress and no one can get to us without going through God. It is not an easy task, but it must be done for the sake of our children and ourselves.
If you've been through a hurricane in your life, you just can't seem to get through it and you need someone to talk to, please do not hesitate to contact me. My email address is sandra.davis123@yahoo.com and my phone number is (772) 359-9688. I care and I want to help!
I get very nervous when hurricane season comes because of the two hurricane that we had one right after another just a few years ago. I do NOT like hurricane season. But just recently, I found my life in hurricane season and it felt like a category 5. My daughter and son sat me down one night and started telling me of things that had happened to them when they were smaller, things that I had no idea about. They relayed to me that my father had done terrible, wicked things to them when they were younger. At first it seemed as if I were in a dream, but it wasn't a dream, it was true. As everything unfolded and time went on, my father was arrested and put in jail. Shortly after being put in jail, he passed away. At that time, I lost not only my father, but also my whole family because my mother, brother, his family, my aunt and uncles all stopped talking to me.
I felt as if I was standing outside during a hurricane and all the force of the wind and rain was blowing against me. I felt as if I just wanted to surrender and let the wind and rain take me anywhere but here. My heart broke because of what my children had endured when they were younger and were still enduring, and because I had lost the rest of my family. I've endured heart-ache before, but I had my family to help me through it and show support. This time I had no one to turn to, no one but God and He was enough! God knew my heart, He knew exactly what I was feeling. Many times when I prayed I did not even say anything, I could not, my heart was breaking too much. But I did not have to say anything, God knew exactly how I felt and what I needed.
I also had to remember that my children were watching me. I wanted to set the right example for them as to how they should respond when bad things happen to them, as it did. I wanted them to learn to turn to God and rely on His strength and comfort. I spent much time in prayer for them and encouraged them to spend much time in prayer talking to God.
Have you been through something similar in your life? Have you given up or have you turned it over to God knowing that He works everything to good? We must remember that our children learn how to respond to the problems of life by how we respond. Let's determine to set the right example for our children and when the hurricanes of life come our way, let's show our children that God is our refuge and strength in the time of trouble. Let's show them that God is our fortress and no one can get to us without going through God. It is not an easy task, but it must be done for the sake of our children and ourselves.
If you've been through a hurricane in your life, you just can't seem to get through it and you need someone to talk to, please do not hesitate to contact me. My email address is sandra.davis123@yahoo.com and my phone number is (772) 359-9688. I care and I want to help!
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
In God we trust
A woman was once driving through Oregon over the Cascade Range and ran into a snowstorm. She had never driven in snow before and became very frightened. She could either continue on in the storm, stop to buy snow chains, or spend the night in a nearby town. As she pondered her options, she peered ahead and saw a snowplow. She could follow the plow and miss the worst of the driving conditions! Rejoicing in her fortune, she kept as close to the truck as she could while it removed snow from the road. At times the heavy snowfall almost cut off her view, but her faithful guide kept on leading the way. After some time, the plow stopped and its driver got out and walked over to her car. "Lady, where are you going?" he asked. "I'm on my way to Central Oregon," she replied. "Well," he said, "you'll never get there following me! I'm plowing this parking lot!"
Do you ever feel like you're trying to plow through life's storms only to find out you're going in circles? The storms of life have a way of confusing us and leading us down the wrong path. Yet there is one certain way we can find the right path even during difficulties and that's by following God's direction.
D.L. Moody once said, "Trust in yourself, and you are doomed to disappointment; trust in your friends, and they will die and leave you; trust in reputation, and some slanderous tongue may blast it; but trust in God, and you are never to be confounded in time or eternity."
God is faithful and always comes through on His promises. As D.L. Moody said, placing faith in other people, no matter how much they love you or how good their intentions are, will ultimately lead to disappointment. Even good people fail. Yet when you place your faith in God and claim the promises of His Word each day, you will never be disappointed.
It is important that we teach this lesson to our children this as well. Children are very impressionable and they often look up to people and try to pattern their lives them. Many young people have fallen and given up hope because their "idol" gave into temptation and fell, like humans do every day. You can never start too early teaching your children that God is the one who will never fail them, He is the constant in every situation and if they set their focus solely on God, He will never direct them down the right path.
Let's determine to not let the failures of others stop us from focusing on God. Let's set our sights on God and allow Him to direct our paths continually. Determine to spend time in God's Word, find His promises and claim them today. God will never fail us and always He keeps His promises!
Do you ever feel like you're trying to plow through life's storms only to find out you're going in circles? The storms of life have a way of confusing us and leading us down the wrong path. Yet there is one certain way we can find the right path even during difficulties and that's by following God's direction.
D.L. Moody once said, "Trust in yourself, and you are doomed to disappointment; trust in your friends, and they will die and leave you; trust in reputation, and some slanderous tongue may blast it; but trust in God, and you are never to be confounded in time or eternity."
God is faithful and always comes through on His promises. As D.L. Moody said, placing faith in other people, no matter how much they love you or how good their intentions are, will ultimately lead to disappointment. Even good people fail. Yet when you place your faith in God and claim the promises of His Word each day, you will never be disappointed.
It is important that we teach this lesson to our children this as well. Children are very impressionable and they often look up to people and try to pattern their lives them. Many young people have fallen and given up hope because their "idol" gave into temptation and fell, like humans do every day. You can never start too early teaching your children that God is the one who will never fail them, He is the constant in every situation and if they set their focus solely on God, He will never direct them down the right path.
Let's determine to not let the failures of others stop us from focusing on God. Let's set our sights on God and allow Him to direct our paths continually. Determine to spend time in God's Word, find His promises and claim them today. God will never fail us and always He keeps His promises!
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